Tuesday, 28 February 2006

sini ne..

Well the title of this post is not, in any way, related to wat i am going to write now.. it just happened to be the song i am hearing right now.. luv this song.. does anyone knows the maning of these turkish words?
hey ppl i've added a lot of add-ons on mah blog.. have u checked'em out? the hangman on the left is cool.. i am sure u all must have played that hollywood/bollywood kinda game where u hav to guess a movie n every wrong letter cut off one from "HOLLYWOD".. it is same kinda game.. And i also added this cute duckie.. a fren said.. iski mundi puri ghoom jaati hai..bas aur isme cute kya hai? ( its head rotates in 360 degrees.. so what else is cute in this?) he he.. lol..
And i've got addicted.. to "bournvita".. LOL.. it has got some superchargers, with some vitamins n minerals.. but thats not y i have got addicted to it.. i think it tastes yummy with milk.. *swipe my lips with my tongue*..
and i've also found a new time-pass, to watch peacocks.. there are quite a few of them in my campus.. They r absolutely gorgeous.. by the way did u know that male peacock has those lovely feathers, but female ones dont. It is cos the mail ones show'em off to female ones to attract them for mating.. isnt that cute.. LOL.. vaise they r so cautious when they walk.. they look left-right-left before crossing a road.. even when it is empty.. They fly very li'l, with their heavy wings they cant fly at higher altitudes.. so wat they do when they wants to reach upto some higher place is , they look at their destination two or three times before taking the final plunge ( i really dont know wat they actually think wen they luk like that, maybe thinking whether to jump or not, or maybe assess the distance..) anyways, i also saw a woodpecker yday.. it kept on doing that "tak-taka-tak-tak" continuously on a tree.. i felt like saying to him that please dont be so hard on urself.. ur will break ur beak.. but no, he wont listen.. if he is so hell-bent in breaking himself then let it be.. why am i so worried...
vaise here it is this "patjhad" (fall) season going on and watching roads full of dried,yellow neem leaves feels so artistic.. like straight from a scenery.. and there r sooo many bouganvillae plants here.. with bright pink, yellow, white flowers.. they remind me so much of baunta, in delhi where i went for my early morning jogs.. anyways lot of nature gazing has happened lemme go back to my studies i have a test 2rrw.. so chao for now :)

What am I to you ?

What am I to you
Tell me darling true
To me you are the sea
Vast as you can be
And deep the shade of blue

When you're feeling low
To whom else do you go
See I cry if you hurt
I'd give you my last shirt
Because I love you so

If my sky should fall
Would you even call
Opened up my heart
I never want to part
I'm giving you the ball

When I look in your eyes
I can feel the butterflies
I love you when you're blue
Tell me darlin true
What am I to you

Yah well if my sky should fall
Would you even call
Opened up my heart
Never want to part
I'm giving you the ball

When I look in your eyes
I can feel the butterflies
Could you find a love in me
Could you carve me in a tree
Don't fill my heart with lies

I will you love when you're blue
Tell me darlin true
What am I to you
What am I to you
What am I to you

---Norah Jones
Friday, 24 February 2006

My personality.. decoded..

Its such a great feeling to be up and doing something.. i have recovered from my sickness now.. feeling chirpy.. Flip side being i missed a couple of assignments and now ihave to do them as well as the new ones.. Now i hope i dont get down withllness again by getting over-worked!!! I just slept and slept in last 2 days...I have to get my haemoglobin checked nd i am so damn scared of the needles that i keep putting it off.. i may not even go :D.. instead i'll start eating apples and drink juice daily...And during this time I gave some stupid tests on blogthings and posting them here.. I happen to see a movie today.. Though i have loads of work to do i just cdnt resist watching it, especially wen it is right on my desktop.. its called "Along came polly" dunno how popular this movie is but i find it quite cute.. vaise rubin just kinda left his work n all to go after jennifer aniston((i forgot her name in d movie :D.. i just saw it 10 mins before)).. i wonder does that happen in real life too.. like suddenly u feel everything for a one person.. dont want to let her/him go.. run after them like crazy.. i've never seen anything like that in real life.. Anyways here goes all my blog-thing results---

Your Personality Is
Idealist (NF)

You are a passionate, caring, and unique person.
You are good at expressing yourself and sharing your ideals.
You are the most compassionate of all types and connect with others easily.
Your heart tends to rule you. You can't make decisions without considering feelings.
You seek out other empathetic people to befriend.
Truth and authenticity matters in your friendships.
In love, you give everything you have to relationships. You fall in love easily.
At work, you crave personal expression and meaning in your career.
With others, you communicate well. You can spend all night talking with someone.
As far as your looks go, you've likely taken the time to develop your own personal style.
On weekends, you like to be with others. Charity work is also a favorite pastime of yours.

You Are a Newborn Soul

You are tolerant, accepting, and willing to give anyone a chance.
On the flip side, you're easy to read and easily influenced by others.
You have a fresh perspective on life, and you can be very creative.
Noconformist and nontraditional, you've never met anyone who's like you.

Inventive and artistic, you like to be a trendsetter.
You have an upbeat spirit and you like almost everything.
You make friends easily and often have long standing friendships.
Implusive and trusting, you fall in love a little too easily.

Souls you are most compatible with: Bright Star Soul and Dreaming Soul

Your Five Variable Love

Propensity for Monogamy:

Your propensity for monogamy is medium.
In general, you prefer to have only one love interest.
But it's hard for you to stay devoted for too long!
There's too much eye candy to keep you from wandering.

Experience Level:

Your experience level is high.
You've loved, lost, and loved again.
You have had a wide range of love experiences.
And when the real thing comes along, you know it!


Your dominance is low.
This doesn't mean you're a doormat, just balanced.
You know a relationship is not about getting your way.
And you love to give your sweetie a lot of freedom.


Your cynicism is medium.
You'd like to believe in true and everlasting love...
But you've definitely been burned enough to know better.
You're still an optimist, but you also are a realist.


Your independence is low.
This doesn't mean you're dependent in relationships..
It does mean that you don't have any problem sharing your life.
In your opinion, the best part of being in love is being together.

Your Five Factor Personality


You have high extroversion.
You are outgoing and engaging, with both strangers and friends.
You truly enjoy being with people and bring energy into any situation.
Enthusiastic and fun, you're the first to say "let's go!"


You have medium conscientiousness.
You're generally good at balancing work and play.
When you need to buckle down, you can usually get tasks done.
But you've been known to goof off when you know you can get away with it.


You have high agreeableness.
You are easy to get along with, and you value harmony highly.
Helpful and generous, you are willing to compromise with almost anyone.
You give people the benefit of the doubt and don't mind giving someone a second chance.


You have low neuroticism.
You are very emotionally stable and mentally together.
Only the greatest setbacks upset you, and you bounce back quickly.
Overall, you are typically calm and relaxed - making others feel secure.

Openness to experience:

Your openness to new experiences is high.
In life, you tend to be an early adopter of all new things and ideas.
You'll try almost anything interesting, and you're constantly pushing your own limits.
A great connoisseir of art and beauty, you can find the positive side of almost anything.
Five Factor Personality Test

By the way, I found every bit of this to be true... Now everyone reading this knows wat i am like :D.. hmm.. is it bad???
Wednesday, 22 February 2006

Word Cloud

Saw word cloud on Jewel Ray's blog.. posting mine too :D.. A few phrases caught my eye.. like "happy heart" hmm.. thats an irony, nevertheless a nice phrase.. then "good hai".. i use this phrase often.. meaning "its gud".. then there is "complete content".. "transitional truth".. "free girl".."objectionable office".. lol
can u spot more phrases that make some sense??


Hey frens, welcome to my new blog... I've crudely kinda copied my posts from prev blog.. so there r no images here and the posts r a bit shuffled/repeated.. anyways, um glad to have a new blog..
Tuesday, 21 February 2006

Fever :(

I've caught mild fever and i absolutely hate the feeling of tiredness and dizziness.. i've got lots of work to do n this seems to tie me down.. *sigh*
Monday, 20 February 2006

That thing you do

This is my fav song..luved its rythm.. its been long since i heard it..
(right now i'm dedicating it to someone..)

Doin that thing you do,
Breaking my heart into a million pieces,
Like you always do
And you,
Dont mean to be cruel,
You never even knew about the heartache,
I've been going through
Well I try and try to forget you girl,
But its just so hard to do,
Every time you do that thing you do

Know all the games you play,
And I'm gonna find a way to let you know that,
You'll be mine someday
Cause we,
Could be happy can't you see,
If you'd only let me be the one to hold you,
And keep you here with me
Cause I try and try to forget you girl,
But it's just so hard to do,
Every time you do that thing you do

I don't ask a lot girl,
But I know one thing's for sure,
Its the love I havent got girl,
And I just can't take it anymore

Cause we,
Could be happy can't you see,
If you'd only let me be the one to hold you,
And keep you here with me
Cause it hurts me so just to see you go,
Around with someone new,
And if I know you you're doin that thing,
Every day just doin that thing,
I can't take you doing that thing you do

By- The wonders..

hey ppl, check out the cutie cutie cuppy-cake-song on Manish's blog.. its chhooo chweet, i listened to it numerous times yday :D
Friday, 17 February 2006


After a very nice birthday, today seems really unbelievable.. if yesterday was best of all days, today was worst of all. I slept till late so missed my breakfast.. wento class with my stomach growling like a hungry lion(btw i really dont know nething abt hungry lions or tigers or any animal for that matter.. but with an empty and growling stomach u really can, i mean u really can compare it with anything.. grrrr ). And the class was not that interesting today.. it was a sleeping pill.. inspite of waking up just 45 mins before class, i had difficulty in keeping my head straight, so listening to sir was out of question.. My second lecture was no good either.. all boring stuff.. I wonder how she (my second lecturer of the day) manage to listen to herself.. she doesnt even bother to complete her sentences.. I waited for, what seems like eternity, the bell to ring and my ordeal to end..
Now that wasnt the end of my worst day.. i came to my hostel only to find today's lunch constitute of a healthy diet with soyabean... Soyabean!!! yuck!!! even its luks were like eewww!!! i ate just one byte and left the rest.. So now i've missed breakfast and lunch too.. i thought, oh! wats the big deal, i'll go out in an hour or so..
Came back to my room and started reading an M&B.. i started crying on reading that stupid M&B.. according to which all love-stories have some share of cries.. damn!! why did i picked it up anyways!! So eventually not-feeling-that-gud i dint go out for my lunch.. i sulked and sulked more in mah room.. And i think i forgot to mention my severe headache.. my eyes are hurting too.. and one of my wisdom tooth is coming out, which also aches as hell..to top it all a friend of mine called me up and instead of sympathising with me, started laughing.. wanna kick him now...

Now i've had dinner, but still feeling a little bad.. no actually angry!!or mabe both.. life is not fair.. nothing is fair.. everything is bad.. bad bad aches.. bad bad hunger.. bad bad everything..
Thursday, 16 February 2006


last few days went away quickly.. um back at mah hostel.. have to start studying again.. no more masti now.. The trip to home was better than i expected.. i went for shopping n ended up buying almost double of wat i intended to buy, for a simple reason that there was a sale going on and that too at 50%... :) just love the end of season sale...

Then i also saw "Rang De Basanti".. awsome movie.. its effect still lingers on my mind.. and i cried too.. *sob*.. very heart touching story.. the best dialogue was, "Then i met the third kind".. it was said twice in the story but its meaning was clear only when Amir n one of his friend got shot.

And i have turned 22 today.. last nite there was lotsa halla gulla at my hostel.. i was sleeping soundly after long bus journey from home and one of my fren knocked the door to say, "chal jogging karne chale.." n i thought its morning already.. i opened the door to say um not coming n there they were.. all of my hostelmates.. singing " happy bday to uuuuu.. " and "many boyfriends to u.." lol.. i was so surprised.. all in all a gud celebration.. cutting the cake.. blowing up baloons with candles.. eating yummy kachoris..
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME... :) and check out this site.. its awsome..
[14/02/2006 12:10:09]
Wednesday, 8 February 2006


I recently read an article about superstitions (despite my very very busy schedule, i manage to read somethings :) ) People go to every length to avoid something they think is not shubh(auspicious). Even my mom is a bit superstituous, actually a lot. Like giving Re.1/- with any shagun(gifts in cash). why? because its not shubh to give money with 0s in the end...!!! She gives away coins on saturday to keep shani devta happy. i wonder wat that person does with all these coins, offers them to some god or spend them on his food and liquor. I have seen many ppl turning their backs if a black cat, or sometimes any cat, cross their ways. Now a cat is a mere animal not sent by some evil to cast off bad luck upon you. And i hate it most when people matching kundalis prior to a marriage, as if kundali-marriages dont have their share of problems, problems come in all phases of life but u cant blame ur partner for bringing bad luck.. Then people consults pandits for muhurats to start something. Arre every time is as good..And one fav of my neighourhood aunty- dont wash your hair on thursday; I even have had a fight with her. Due to my workout schedules (thursday off) i always make it a point to wash my hair that day, and she never forgets to comment "aaj to thuursday hai baal kyu dhoye".. and she doesnt even knows the reason why she doesnt wash her hair on that day..

A few more weirdo superstitions.. like a child born with teeth will become extremely selfish. A crow cawing on your roof top means a guest is coming, how many times guests actually came is really very ridiculous. And then a friend of mine crosses her fingers before her results are about to come..Then giving curd or sugar before going out of the house for some work.. or calling a person behind his back when he is about to leave is not good for the work due to which he is about to leave.

One of my mom's weirdest superstitous is not to sweep the floor atleast till 10 minutes after my papa leaves for his office.. ah.. if i start writing her all superstitions then probably this space is going to fall short.. so i stop here..

My views:-
I think all this is sheer stupidity.. if there is some reason behind doing or not doing something i do it, even though that is considered superstition. No reason behind something = It is not done by me... as simple as that..

I found a page on superstitions.. interesting read.. click here
Sunday, 5 February 2006


She stretched her arms further into the darkness, as if she could catch him there. But, she forgot, people dont come to you like that. The emptiness overtook her mind. Again. Her eyes kept staring at the silhouetteof darkness. Her ears listening to the echo of nothing. Her skin still feeling the touch of warm air. Her cheeks embracing the coolness of something wet. was she crying? She doesnt know.. She doesnt remember.. For she was blank, She was numb with pain, She could sense nothing except the nonchalant void.

That night passed away, slowly, wrapped indifferently in the aura of sadness around her. Morning came but didnt bother to ask her before coming. "Wakeup", it says to everybody, but not to her, not today, not when she is 'down and out' with an heartache, she cant bear to carry.

Days passed on. World went on in its own ways, she did too. Like a robot, sans emotions, she did what she was supposed to do. Going to office, working, having meals, coming back and then sleeping. She did everything but forgot to smile. It bewildered her, to see her friends smile. How could they? Dont they feel the sadness? Dont they feel lonely? They were his friends too, dont they feel the loss so immense?

Sometimes she wished she could turn around time and ask him not to go out to get the red roses, for she doesnt need them anymore. She woke up numerous times in the night, slightly quivering, by the sight of red roses and red blood. His red blood. As red as the red saree she bought to wear next month on their wedding.

Then, one day came the sunshine from between the grey-est of clouds. Her new boss came in the office. He quickly became apple of everyone's eye, not because he was dashing but because of his gentle n jolly nature. He made everyone smile. There was only one person with whom he never conversed with, except for the office matter. Our very own "She"..

Whenever he tried to have a colloquy with her, all he ever got was a yes-no answer. He never gave up trying though, he couldnt, he was deeply intrigued by this lady, who was as efficient as one could be in doing her work but never smiled. He never knew why but it became his covert desire to make her smile, to see her happy.

She noticed too. She tried not to see him when he arrived in the office. She felt peculiar, constatntly aware of his presence. She tried to avoid him, yet looked for him when he was not around. Her eyes longed to see his glowing face, always full of enthusiasm. He became the mark of everything she felt had died in her, her feelings were totally complemented by his. Maybe that was the reason she felt the need to see him every now and then, to remind her, there is still happiness left in the world.

One day, while carrying her coffee she banged into him, spoiled his shirt, and on seeing his astonished look, she smiled. They parted ways, for everyone it was just another small incident, but for them it was everything.

"She smiled... did she actually? or was it just my imagination", thought jubiliated he. He felt on top of this world. His mission accomplished.
"I smiled..", She thought too. She was relieved that she could smile too, she has not forgotten. For the rest of day, smile didnot left her lips. She looked like an angel with the best make-up, her smile, she donned after months. In coming days, they both smiled at each other whenever they came face to face. Silent smiles felt more intimate than deep conversations.

Smiles were slowly followed by hellos, then started small talks. "Do you want a coffee?".. "You look nice today".. "I need your help in completing this report".. "Have you cooked your lunch yourself?".. "You presented well in the meeting".. "its late, shall i drop you home today?".. "I went shopping yesterday, i bought this for you, like it?".. "Will you come to dinner with me"..

With each passing day their affection for eath other grew like mushrooms on a wild terrain, uncontrollable. No day went by without witnessing them together in an office meeting or a roadside restaurant.Their work got recognised too,they both got promoted in office. He still remaining her boss. In the evening, when they were celebrating their hardwork, he asked her. He asked her, "Will you marry me?".
She went silent, her past came before her eyes in an instant. Biting back her tears she ran out without saying a word, leaving him guiltridden. He dint knew about her previous engagement, how could he? She never gave him any chance to know her past.

Next week they had to leave to delhi for a conference. An awkward silence had fallen between them. When she saw him she knew not, how to behave. Pass a smile to him or turn her eyes? She did none, just stared at him. He got bewildered, wanted to reach out to her and hug her. Ego, is a very strong repellant in such situations. Both were wishing something to come up so that either one neednot go to delhi.
Like time, destiny doesnt listen to your wishes. They both were on board on same flight, sitting side by side. Their hands stroking each other occasionally. Accidently?

Suddenly she said, "I am sorry". "what?". "I said i am sorry". "Oh, OK".. silence again. His heart missed a beat when she said that. He was already regretting he didnt said more. Moments then minutes passed away in silent contemplations. Before he made up his mind to say something, the flight landed. They drifted away slowly into the crowd.
Rest of their day went un-incidently. After the meeting next day, exhausted, lying on bed, he remembered her. He remembered "us". In next moments, powered by an urge, he went in front of her room. She too opened her room exactly at the same moment. She looked amazed, before she could say anything, He hugged her. "I am sorry too", he heard himself say. Pushed her inside, closed the door behind him and started kissing her. The speed with which it happened left her perplexed. In that single instant she lost her ability to resist, to say no, even to think about anything else other than the lips, on whose wetness she was feeding upon. There is only a limited limit to which one can resist the ultimate pleasure.

One by one clothes came out. It was not clear, whether he was leading her or she was pushing him. Both were equally drawn, equally guilty in the game of love and lust. When he saw her nude, lying in front of him, he didnot see her beutiful body, her glowing skin or the fullerness of her breasts. All he saw was the greed in her eyes, the dance of her tongue, her shameless smile. He filled her with his manhood. He gave himself to her, he gave her a part of himself, not just physically. They moved together, giving each other the rich pleasure. It never occured to them that it was their first time. They knew each other's body just too well. And after the final blow, they rested, in each other's arm, feeling their heart beats.

Lying in his arms, feeling his stomach moving steadily with his breath, she felt whole. Her mind wandering in the backlanes of her memory. A single smile had the power to change her. That sole smile had the power to make her fall in love, not only with him, but with life. Her life became beautiful again.

When some goes away, you dont have to go with them. Love never dies, Juda hoke bhi tu mujhme kahi baaki hai. Life always gives second chances, but dont let them go waste. Fall in love and see the beauty of the most beautiful feeling in this world.